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Location: Fort Myers, Florida, United States

People tell me that my sarcasm and cynicism will get me into trouble some day. We'll see.

Monday, December 12, 2005

Merry Christmas! (oooops!)

I just want to wish you a Merry Christmas. But I cannot. Why not, you ask? Because I don't know if you're a Christian, a Jew, a Muslim, or what you are.

You see, if you're not a Christian, then you may take offense at me wishing you happiness for an occasion you may not celebrate.

Therefore, I feel I must hide behind something more politically correct.

So, I wish you Happy Holidays!

No, wait, I cannot wish you that, either. Why not, you again ask?

Because the word "holiday" comes from the Olde English "halig daeg" or Holy Day. Since I don't know if you are an atheist or not, I don't want to risk offending you by wishing you joy on a day whose "holiness" you may not agree with.

OK, so what am I left with? Oh! I've got one!

Season's Greetings!

Hold on ... I don't think I can use that one either. Why not, you must be sick of asking by now?

Well, some say that "Jesus is the Reason for the Season." While I would dare not challenge that statement, some might believe that to use the word "season" in the context of a greeting this time of year might offend anyone who may not believe in Jesus.

So is there ANYTHING I can safely say in order to wish you well during the month of December?

I guess not. Have a Nice Day.

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