Going Postal

The other day, I had the need to send a package via the US Postal Service. I walked into the Post Office, waited my turn in line, and stepped forward to the desk clerk.

"I'd like to send this to New York and insure it for a thousand dollars, please," I stated, in what I thought was relatively clear English.

"It would be cheaper to send it 'Registered,'" was his response.

"oh-kaaaay ..." I began, "if I send it REGISTERED, can I insure it for a thousand dollars?"

"You don't need to insure it," he iterated, "all you have to do is register it."

At this point, I was tempted to say, 'Look. I want to send THIS PACKAGE to New York. If this package doesn't REACH New York, I want THE POST OFFICE to give me ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS. Is there any way YOU can make it happen like that??"

That's what I wanted to say - but I am typically not that rude. What came out instead was, "I don't understand."

That is where he explained it to me, in a manner that seemed somewhat "down-putting." Apparently, if I sent the package "registered for $1000," the total cost of the postage would have been a bit less than sending it "insured" for $1000. The cost difference? Less than a dollar, of course.

There was nobody behind me when I entered the Post Office, and there were four people behind me when I left. Draw your own conclusion.