Sardonic nit witticism
- Name: The Sarcasticynic
- Location: Fort Myers, Florida, United States
People tell me that my sarcasm and cynicism will get me into trouble some day. We'll see.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Sunday, November 02, 2008
Extra Hour of Sleep My Left Butt Cheek!
OK, so they say that we set our clocks back this weekend. An extra hour of sleep, they tell me. Time to get back that hour of sleep we lost in the Spring. To be honest, I really don't miss those sixty minutes that much anymore. I mean, when was that, about six months ago? Been a lot of other things to lose sleep over during that period, wouldn't you say?
Anyway, here's how it usually goes for me this time of year. I set my alarm clock to wake me at 2:00 AM on Sunday to set my clocks back. I mean after all, that's when it becomes official, right? At 2:00?
So the alarm rings at 2 and I'm all like, "Whaaa?" I'm stumbling around in the dark to find my slippers and bathrobe and stub my toe on the damned nightstand, because usually there's daylight when I normally get out of bed.
Then I fumble for the light switch on the wall. GAAAAA! that light is damned bright. I think I know what they did with the lights at the old Yankee Stadium - they're now in our bedroom.
Anyway, now that I'm up and fully awake, I drag my way through the house changing the eleventy-thousand clocks and watches we have.
Finally at about 2:30, (which is now 1:30,) I grumble back into bed.
So guess what happens when my newly adjusted bedside clock radio again reaches 2:00?
You got it - the alarm rings again.
SHEEEE-IT! I'm not sure I remember what became of that clock radio, but I do recall I needed a new one anyway.
I usually wake up about 7:00. So do the cats. In fact, it's the cats' internal timeclock that is more likely to wake me than the clock radio. Guess that won't be a problem again until I get another one.
Anyway, the cats roll in around 6:59 when their stomachs start collectively growling and they come nuzzling along side of me to get up to feed them. Only guess what? It's not really 6:59 but now it's 5:59. Damned cats need to reset their internal clocks! (And at 2:00 too. Why should us humans be the only ones to suffer through that extra hour of sleep??)
I yawn through my breakfast, and get on with my usual Sunday routines. Around 11:00 I'm starving as hell, and why wouldn't I be? My stomach's still on Daylight Savings Time and it thinks it's noon. I eat lunch anyway, Standard Time be damned.
Well, of course that throws off dinner time because we are to visit the In-Laws and they have set arrival at 6:00, (which my still unadjusted bodyclock says it's 7:00.)
By 10, I'm really tired, and why wouldn't I be? Old bodyclock says it's 11:00 at night. Monday morning at 5:59 by my new clock radio, there's ol' Buster and Blue Eyes nosing in on my much deserved sleep. Apparently it will take a few days for them to adjust as well.
I'm afraid I'm going to doze off in my easy chair while waiting for the clock to reach the time I leave for work . I finally bumble into the office at 8:30, my usual time, and try to get some tasks done. I yawn through lunch and rub my eyes through endless afternoon meetings wondering when 5:00 is ever going to roll around. It seems to take an eternity, and then I remember why. My internal sundial feels that 5:00 is 6:00 and by then I'm usually thinking about dinner on the drive home.
So I finally get home, and it's dark outside. Can hardly see the keys for the door because the porch light isn't on. (Why can't those lousy mechanical lamp timers know when the time changes? Make that eleventy-thousand and one clocks.)
Wife asks, "How was your day, Dear?"
I can't say. I'm still trying to recover from my 'Extra Hour of Sleep.'